New single, this is the taster of things to come from the young scallywags from Sheffield.
I wasn't a fan of the first album, and I don't think it's an age thing. I don't think being an old, miserable, bitter cunt equates to lack of taste. People try and tell me that the first album was to todays kids, what "Defintely Maybe" was to me. That's total shite that, like.
Don't get me wrong, the "I Bet You.." single was a fantastic pop tune, but that's exactly what it was, pop. It wasn't anything experimental, groundbreaking or world changing, just good clean pop. And we all like a nice bit of pop, it makes the world go round, but there's only so much of it I can take. Plus they're also guilty of creating the criminal chat up line that virginal indie boys use with virginal indie girls, "I bet you look good on the dancefloor", before they go off behind the bins of Ku Club for a bit fingering.
So "Brianstorm" opens up and it's the music off Pulp Fiction mixed up a bit with "Gravity's Rainbow" by Klaxons. "Brianstorm" is a witty play on words, changing the word "Brain" to the boys name "Brian", and even though the song begins with the words "Brian......", it's amazing how many useless fucking DJ's keep on introducing the song as "Brainstorm", thick cunts. Course if it was actually called "Brainstorm", they'd have to change the title of it anyway to "Mind-mapping" so they don't upset the eppy throwing fit freaks. Political correctness eh?
So it goes on a bit and goes on a bit more and it mentions "T-shirt and tie combinations" and then it goes on a bit again. Then he throws a bit more of his Steel City twang in with "Thunder!!". Brian is the lad that all the indie lasses want to get shagged off and the lad that all the lads want to be like.
It's shite like, honest man, it's just shite. It doesn't do a thing for me. It doesn't do anything, doesn't go anywhere, doesn't say anything, I can't see the point in it.
But the kids are decent enough at coming up with a catchy melody and it's guaranteed to get to the top of the pops. Headline slots at the summer festivals await, how glad I am that I won't be going to any.
Longevity? No, I can't see it, but I'd love them to prove me, and old cunts like me, wrong.
It's out on the 16th of April and you can view the video for the single here........
Thursday 5 April 2007
Arctic Monkeys - Brianstorm
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5 comments:
Well i think this review is not based on a musical opinion, but a boring old cunt who has lost touch with reality and can't see the creativity the Arctic Monkeys are bringing to the table. If you bother to listen to the rest of Favourite worst nightmare, you might chage your perspective of just how wrong you are. Long live Weldon!
You're right about the "boring old cunt", my friend
eeee i remember the day, when you could just make an album and not worry about what some ugly bald sandancer thought about it. Now it seems, they're all top class music journalists. The writer clearly has a very eclectic music collection ranging from ricky martin to milli-vanilli. I sincerely hope that he's not going to review his own record collection otherwise, we can look forward to some riveting reviews on, aqua, gary glitter and the fast food rockers. Long live the NME
B.H
Sammaz, No offense intended. Keep up the good work.
No offence taken, kids. I've got skin thicker than Charles Thickens x
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